Playing with Desire
WHAT YOU’LL GAIN
Learn how to unlock eroticism and create more satisfying sexual experiences together.
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WHO IT’S FOR
Couples looking for new ways to enhance intimacy, have more open conversations about sex, or enjoy even more pleasure.
Learn how to use curiosity and willingness to foster eroticism, increase desire, and create more satisfying experiences together.
Breathe new life into your daily routines by creating erotic rituals unique to your relationship and desires.
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Discover and explore each others’ pleasure points with the help of playful prompts and hands-on exercises.
Esther Perel is the world’s foremost expert on relationships—at home and at work.
Module:
1
Becoming an Erotic Couple
In this module, you’ll learn about eroticism, the influence of your sexual history on your current erotic experiences, and how to turn routine “maintenance sex” into an erotic and pleasurable ritual.
Module:
2
Awakening the Senses
In this module, you’ll discover the seven verbs that shape the way we love and how to use them. You’ll also find multiple hands-on exercises to explore with your partner to engage your senses and tap into the erotic.
Module:
3
You & Me & Us
In this module, you’ll learn the distinction between love and desire and how they each play into the erotic landscape. You’ll also discover why fantasy and imagination are so crucial to cultivating eroticism.
WHY IT WORKS
This course helps you uncover your specific wants to create unique-to-you erotic experiences.
By mapping your Erotic Blueprint first, you’ll be able to make the most of each lesson, self-reflection, and interactive exercise throughout the course.
Each insight, suggestion, and exercise is a next step you can take toward a more vibrant erotic relationship that you define for yourself.
Each lesson offers easy-to-implement suggestions for embracing eroticism and revitalizing your sexual connection.
What others are saying...
I was asked to be an early reviewer for this course. I learned that sex, our sexual experience, is not a singular event, arriving, lingering for some period of time and then over. Our sexual life is always with us, via thoughts, smells, dreams, imagination, touch, sights and other senses. What has changed for me is increased awareness of the notion of the erotic. It is a liberating and expansive notion allowing all manner of pleasures into my daily life. I found this course, with its' focus on enhanced communication and deepening self-awareness, incredibly valuable as a 77 year old women, happily married to my wife for 32 years and knowledgeable about interpersonal communication. It is a rare combination of experiential learning and profound wisdom.
I've been following Esther for years and have seen her speak at psychology conferences, always in a clear, direct manner, with the perfect blend of wisdom and a touch of humour. This course does not disappoint. In this fast-paced, automatic world where everything is immediate, desire and eroticism have a different rhythm. Connecting with oneself is fundamental to connecting with another, without rush, immediacy, and certainly not on autopilot. This course mande me reflect and look at desire through a different lens, a trip inside oneself and an invitation to use our imagination and bring our senses back to life. Each video is excellent, and the way the content is translated into concrete exercises is very valuable. The workbook is particularly helpful as it provides a summary of what Esther talks about, making it easy to follow the instructions. You can always re watch the videos if you missed something or clarify what you learned. I take away many learnings, but the one that has resonated with me the most is about reconnecting with my senses, imagination and the playfulness and being opened and willing to see what happens when we stay 3 minutes more instead of shutting down. Thank you Esther Perel and her team, your work helps so many and what a wonderful gift to be able to take these courses and learn from you.
In my eight year relationship with my husband we have continued to navigate the impacts of the pandemic, career growth and loss, moving and adoption on our desire. This course made me feel grounded in my ability to reach across the divide and provided tools and framework to hold steady as we rock our way through the sometimes stormy seas of arousal.
Bought the bundle even though I mainly wanted to work on my desire. I was positively suprised by "playing with desire"! It's thoughtful, motivating, suprising, effective, and takes some unusual angles. Really loved the concept of the "erotic couple". Thank you Esther, you made tapping into desire and desiring desire so good.
I came to this course having followed Ester's work for some years. I was excited to have a platform and structure with which to embark on a journey of learning and discovery with my partner and the course gave me that and more. I'm so excited to take the course and all I learned into my relationship and see where the journey takes us!
Frequently Asked Questions
Will I get one-on-one advice from Esther?
Playing with Desire is a self-paced course with exercises created by, but not directed by Esther. She will not be providing real-time therapy or feedback to course participants.
What if I want to start the course, but my partner is not on board?
A relationship is made up of the people within it. When one of those people changes, the dynamic of the relationship also changes. If your partner is unwilling or unable to join you in learning about desire, you will still benefit from learning this material on your own.
Should I take Bringing Desire Back or Playing with Desire?
Bringing Desire Back is for individuals in relationships and romantic partners experiencing erotic blocks, lack of desire or desire discrepancies, or challenges in sexual communication who want to remove erotic blocks and reignite desire.
Playing with Desire is for individuals in relationships and romantic partners seeking to tap into new erotic possibilities and bring more aliveness, vitality, and spontaneity into the relationship.
Both courses are designed for people in relationships, though they can be taken with or without a partner.
For the most comprehensive resource, to help spark desire and reignite passionate play, we recommend enrolling in both.
Is this course for me if I’m single or not currently in a relationship?
Though you would likely benefit tremendously from this course, Playing with Desire is designed for people in relationships. It can be taken with or without a partner.
If participating with my partner, do we need to register for two courses?
Your purchase of Playing with Desire includes access for both you and your partner. We invite you to watch the videos together and share the log-in credentials, if necessary. We are not able to provide a separate log-in. If your partner requires access in a separate account, please have them purchase the course.
If I have Rekindling Desire, should I purchase this course?
As excited as we are to share Playing with Desire with you, we believe the materials inside Rekindling Desire are more than enough to help you tap into new erotic possibilities. If you’re interested in learning more about enhancing eroticism, we invite you to revisit the materials inside Rekindling Desire rather than purchasing this new course. Click here to log in to your account and access those materials now.
How long will the course take?
If you watch all the videos and complete all the exercises, it should take you 5–10 hours to complete the entire course.
How does this course work? How should I use it?
When you purchase Playing with Desire, you'll receive a collection of lessons and exercises along with a robust workbook. We recommend that you plan time to watch each lesson and complete the accompanying exercise before moving on to the next lesson.
If you are completing the course with a partner, we suggest watching the videos together and working through the exercises individually. After you have both completed the exercises, come back together to share your responses and have a conversation about your answers and relationship.
If you treat this course as entertainment to be consumed, you may find it entertaining and pick up some new perspectives along the way. On the other hand, if you treat this course as a guide for engaging in new behaviors, thoughts, and ideas, and you take the time to complete each exercise, it’s our hope that you’ll learn something truly new, deeply interesting, and incredibly valuable that will help you navigate relationships of all kinds for the rest of your life.
Whether you binge the course, work through the exercises as an intensive study for date night, or stretch it out over weeks or months is up to you. Do what is best for you.
How does this course differ from Esther’s other courses and products?
While many of Esther’s other materials touch on desire and eroticism, Playing with Desire is a deep dive into enhancing eroticism. Through video lessons and a downloadable workbook, you’ll learn how to bring more aliveness, vitality, and spontaneity back into your sex life.
Does this course address medical issues that block desire?
While Playing with Desire is absolutely appropriate and supportive as a supplemental aid, I invite you to work with a trained relational psychotherapist and your medical provider for personalized support. If you wish to expand and enhance your experience of eroticism in its many forms (including the non-sexual), this course will help you build fulfilling rituals and offer playful exercises to help you play your way to a more erotically charged life. Playing with Desire is not designed to diagnose or treat medical conditions.
Start enhancing your erotic relationships today.
The Desire Bundle
Get both Bringing Desire Back and Playing with Desire and gain the skills to not only address desire discrepancies but also reignite desire and explore new erotic possibilities.
Where Should We Begin?
A Game of Stories
At Work
At Work
Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel
Sessions Live 2026
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