Where Are They Now - Romantic Revival

Click here to view this episode's transcript.

When his first wife died, few people knew how to be there for him—nor did he know how to ask for help. Now, a decade later, he’s ready to live and imagine again with his new partner. Can he assemble a band of creative problem solvers and craft a fresh tune?


Episode 2 of Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel introduces a fresh twist to the series: a follow-up session. His first wife committed suicide. Six years later, her ghost still haunts him, their four children, and his new wife. How, if at all, has the couple picked up the gauntlet that Esther threw down two years earlier—to transition from not-dead to alive?

In Where Are They Now: Romantic Revival, Esther tosses out a fresh challenge to reconnect and get unstuck. 

Listen to the original episode from Season 3 HERE.


What to listen for in this episode of Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel:

  • In the face of danger, we’re often familiar with fight and flight. But, we also have freeze—when an experience is simply too much to absorb and leaves the person paralyzed and helpless. Which is your go-to protective mechanism?
  • Sometimes stepping away from a conversation can bring partners closer. Pause, regain perspective and come back internally regulated for greater compassion and grace. Try this simple but powerful question at home with your partner: “What do you need from me?”
  • When navigating the loss of a loved one, all other problems can seem trivial by comparison. How to develop compassion for the suffering of others though not a matter of life and death?
  • Grief can be incredibly isolating. Often times we don’t know what to say or how to show up for a grieving friend. But it doesn’t have to be complicated. Being present, acknowledging the loss, and creating a space for them to collapse without judgment is more important than fumbling to find the right words.
  • Everyone is interested in their origin stories. Don’t be afraid to talk with kids about a deceased parent. Help them understand who that person was so they can understand more about themselves. There’s so much more to the memories than grief. 
  • Creativity is an active engagement with the unknown. it's risk-taking, it's curiosity, it's exploration, it's discovery, it's mystery. Without it, imagination atrophies. When in a creative rut, who or what can you turn to in order to reignite that spark?

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