“I'm a black man supervising a white woman, and we're supposed to be dealing with racial disparities. There's a tremendous amount of opportunity in this and a whole lot of pitfalls.”
⠀Overview
In Episode 2 of How’s Work? with Esther Perel, a Minnesota lobbyist and his ex-staffer express long-simmering frustrations about the rupture that came between them following George Floyd’s murder. He is a black man, she is a white woman. She felt undervalued, underpaid and undersupported by her closest friend while he suffered the injustices of a system organized around white privilege.
What seems at first like a requiem harmonizes into a more hopeful duet once filters lift and true feelings are voiced. Still, dissonance lingers in Race, Gender and Money as black vs white experiences in America counterpoint the narratives.
⠀Thematics
What to listen for in this episode of How’s Work? with Esther Perel:
- One person may individualize relationship dynamics while another sees them in a larger social context. How to reconcile divergent versions?
- Even with our closest relationships, taboos around directly talking about race can stifle free and open discussion.
- Any productive exchange across diverse groups means examining our own assumptions about the other.
- A fight focused around one issue may mask a deeper, yet riskier, issue we’re not ready to address.
- From imaginary confrontation to real dialogue: Take note of sadness, loss and missed opportunity, and sort fiction from fact.
- What we do — and don’t do — as bystanders in unjust situations shapes our “conscience accountability.”
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